Wednesday, May 26, 2010

心痛

你能够对我坦白,我很开心。到头来你的坦白却换来我们之间的吵架和愤怒,我知道是我小气,我没有肚量去接受这事实。那是因为我只在乎你一个,你是属于我的,我不希望有人把你抢走。你可能有听过“有一种爱叫做放手”,如果真的有一天,这天真的到来,我不知道我会不会把我的手放开。你曾经放开我的手,我很庆幸那时的我没有选择放开。今天,面对同样的情况,我还是不会放手的。虽然我的心好痛,我很不喜欢有别的女生接近你,因为我不想失去你。你是我的全部,因为你,我学会把我爱的人放在第一位。我真的很感谢你对我的坦白,只是我无法承受这犹如一把刀往我心里刺的心痛。你的一举一动,都能够影响我的心情,甚至是一生的幸福。从你的身上,我学会了把自己稳定下来,尽量不要再放纵自己。只有你,才会让我改变得如此之快,也如此温驯。我只会为你而改,我只会为你而活,我只会为你而爱。

Friday, May 14, 2010

FIrst Sem Break For 2010

Finally it has come to the end of the first semester, this is the moment that every student is waiting for. Usually what will a student do in holiday? Work as part timer? Stay at home? Go for vacation? This is life, lets make it more interesting! I don't know how you guys spend your holiday, I'll just tell you mine. To me, it is my life and I'm happy with it.

As usual, I work at DDS, which is one of the cyber cafe in Kampar. In fact, I am a runner for both DDS and Khakabo.Working is tiring me, but I am happy to work with them because I get to know more people and I even meet my friends that have not been seeing for a period. Another reason why I work at cyber cafe is because the working time is more flexible and I can make time adjustment between my study and working time. Although the wage is not high, it is just enough for my rental.

At the last week of the sem break, I will be even busy and tired. Why? Because I need to attend chinese orchestra camp from 25-29th May, from 9am til 4pm, then I need to work from 4pm til 12am. You may think I am crazy and I admit it, this is the only way for me not to think too much when I am alone. I hate to be home alone.

You may ask, how about my home? I can say, I don't want to go back, it is like jail, that's why I don't like to go home. Why would I say home is like a jail? This is because mum seldom let me go out and I only do nothing at home but online until I wanna vomit. Another thing is they seldom talk to me nicely. I have to make it clear that all my family members are grumpy person, including me, sometimes they make me feel like I live in jail because of their way of speaking and grumpy personality. I just wanna run away from it. Family is important, but I am sorry that I not that kind of person which can stay at home for 24 hours everyday. I need my life and freedom. They never understand how I feel, or maybe not, god knows.

At last, I will go for vacation to Cameron Highland next week. MUAHAHAHAHA. This is the first time I am going vacation with my bf and classmates since I study at UTAR 2 years ago. I still planning where to go and what to do. There is many things to do and yet, so little time for me to do all of them, I just can say, have fun then. Life is short and lets us appreciate what we have at the moment. Enjoy your time and HAPPY HOLIDAY MY FRIENDS! =P

Friday, May 7, 2010

世界上最爱你的人,也是世界上最伤心的人

我知道你能够看得懂我接下来要写的文章,我不敢奢望在你看了这文章后会有回头的一刻,我只希望你能够清楚知道我在想什么,我想要的是什么。


可能你和我都不曾想过咱们会走在一起,究竟是什么让我们走在一起?相信你我心中都没有答案,但是我们都相信彼此心中的感觉。彼此都是爱着对方的,所以才会想让彼此存在于各自的世界里,因为只有让对方活在自己的世界里,才能用自己的全部来保护对方,不让他受伤。当自己爱上一个人时,心里只想着要如何让他时刻都开心,而不会让他伤心。人非神圣,总会有犯错的时候,也会有情绪的。当你犯了错,我只会心痛,我不会骂你,不管是什么错,我都会原谅你,包容你所做的一切,甚至把全部不开心的事全忘掉。可能有的人会说我这么做是在逃避,我只能告诉全部人,我这么做是让我们的生活更轻松,不会有任何的负担,生活才会更好过,不是吗?


爱一个人,并不需要他的甜言蜜语,也不需要任何付出的证明书,只要心里是爱着彼此的,就已经足够了。既然我已经打开心房的门让你进去成为其中的一分子,就表示我已经全面接受你所有的弱点和优点。你不会说的甜言蜜语,我帮你说。你想要做的事,我会想办法去完成。这就是我爱你的方式。我和你一样,都是不善于表达的人,我只能通过行动来表示。很傻是吗?你也是如此的,不是吗?


不知不觉,我们在一起快要一年了。此时此刻你说你不曾告诉我你有多爱我,但是我都能知道你的爱有多深。时间长了,相处的日子长了,彼此都了解对方的性格与脾气,很多时候都会变得沉默寡言,彼此都不会特地去表达心中所想。可是很多时候,误会,就是这样产生的。可能我是属于比较静的人,而你也不会特意的表达心中的想法,所以误会才会发生吧。


不管怎么说,我们都是受过伤的人,保护自己是本能反应。任何人都会想要被爱,任何人都会想要爱上其他人。刚开始我们都是战战兢兢的爱,到后来是放开怀抱来爱,这过程是需要时间的,慢慢来,好吗?你总是爱对我说些傻话,我也一笑置之。因为你的傻话,我知道你爱我。世界上最爱你的人,也是世界上最开心、最伤心的人,认同吗?

Monday, May 3, 2010

看了妹妹的部落格,才知道自己忽略了许多事

看了妹妹的部落格,才知道自己忽略了许多事

自己曾经忽略了心爱的人的一举一动
就连自己曾经经历的一切都忘掉
我不是有意去把全部事情都忘掉
只是潜意识里帮我做了个决定
它, 让我的生活更轻松

一生当中难免会有被我们遗忘的人或事
就在乎它会在什么时候被勾起
有开心的,也有悲伤的
不要被身边的事约束着
敢做敢当  生活才会更精彩
被身边事物约束着的生活 犹如被囚禁
每日规规矩矩的生活  活在只属于自己的世界
这样的生活  犹如行尸走肉 不要也罢

身边被忽略的事
无非是曾经自己最在意的事